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Warning! Mushy mother stuff in this post!

As each day passes, I feel more and more grateful and thankful and lucky that I have this time to spend with Sienna. She is such a good girl and a marvel and a wonder and she has helped me stop and look at life instead of just whizzing on by it. It is so amazing to see her grow and learn and to just be. Of course not everyday is all sunshine and roses! There might be times I want to scream out loud (or even quietly) or times I wish to be left alone to craft or shop or just laze around. I am not a saint after all! But honestly, I can’t see my life without Sienna. And I look forward to crafting with her and shopping with her and just being lazy with her. Being a parent is really fucking hard but as the cliché goes – it is worth every minute of it. And you really don’t truly understand it until you become a parent yourself. And it might not be evident right away either. It really is becoming more apparent lately. I guess because she is becoming more of a personality and we are beginning to see ourselves in her or maybe it’s just that the initial shock of becoming a parent is starting to wear off. HA!

I’m mostly writing this post as a reminder to myself for those days I might want to scream or want to be left alone to craft or shop or just be lazy (or when she becomes a teenager and I wonder what I have gotten myself into all over again – shudder!!!) And to remind myself that there are those out there that are not as fortunate. I know this little girl whose mother probably needs a reminder like this. I may not know the whole story but from where I can see, this mother doesn’t seem to spend more than a couple of hours (if that) with her daughter on a daily basis. Understandable for a single working mother. But then she shuffles off her child to someone else to take care of every weekend. Every weekend!  I don’t know when she spends any significant time with her own daughter. That is sad. I don’t think she realizes she’s missing the wonder and amazement and excitement of seeing your own flesh and blood develop into a real person. To see your child mimicing what you are doing and want to be like you. To see her learning and seeing your morals being instilled – and carried out! – by her. Hopefully one day soon she will realize what she is missing and change her attitude and realize you can’t pick and choose when you want to be a mother to your daughter. And hopefully this little girl won’t get tired of waiting for her mother to be her mother. This reminds me of a sad story told to me by some other moms. They were in the playground with their kids one day and a little girl came up to them practically begging for food because she was so hungry. It turns out her mother was busy making out with her boyfriend on the bench to pay her any attention! The unfortunate aspect of both these situations is it’s the little girls that will be suffering the most and that makes me cry.

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